The missus decided that

, after she had one, I needed a Cholesterol test done. She was borderline high, (which in Scotland is considered "good".)

Now, on opening the testing kit, I found that several groups were prone to heart desease: Smoking (check), Diabetes (family history), High Blood Pressure (CHECK!), Having close relatives with heart problems (mMmm), Being overweight (check!), lack of exercise (check!), drinking too much alcohol (check!) and being male (check!).

So obviously she thought I'd get a higher result than she. After the required amount of blood was leeched out of me - it turns out that I have a level of 4.8 - lower than her, and considered "normal".

Har har.

So today in retribution, she starts hunting my scalp for grey hairs. She even claims she found a few (to the cries of "It starts! I've Succeeded! My work here is done!"), but I dont believe her.. I mean, I'd have to shave my head coatsie-like to live down the shame..